What you imagine, you create
Limiting beliefs…these have been the bane of my existence, up until my spiritual awakening. Now I know what they are, and why they are so detrimental to reaching one’s fullest potential. Fortunately, once you can recognize and spot them, you can change them.
First, for those that have never heard of limiting beliefs…what are they? Well, let’s discuss what a belief is.
What are core beliefs and why do they matter?
A belief is merely an idea that we have accepted as fact and now believe to be true. That is all a belief is. An idea that we accept as truth. In fact, nothing matters more than our core beliefs. They are the root causes of many of our problems, including our automatic negative thoughts.
Yet, core beliefs are precisely that: beliefs. Based on childhood assessments, they are often untrue. They are also self-perpetuating. Like magnets, they attract evidence that makes them stronger, and they repel anything that might challenge them. But it is possible to change them.
Common examples of core beliefs:
They are also known as schemas, which shape how we process and interpret new information.
- Core beliefs
- Dysfunctional assumptions
- Negative automatic thoughts
We can think of our automatic negative thoughts as the situational expressions of our dysfunctional assumptions and negative core beliefs.
What you think, you become.
What you feel, you attract.
What you imagine, you create.
– Buddha
How did I experience the effect of limiting beliefs and positive thinking in my family?
When I began to question my own thought patterns, I started paying attention to people’s words and behaviors. It quickly became apparent why they are where they are, and which beliefs shape their thinking. I no longer wondered why some people mostly experience positive things while others always seem to be victims of circumstances. What is the difference between these two attitudes or lifestyles?
I would like to bring a very fitting example from the two extremes from my own family. Due to her chronic illnesses, my mom has been taking a lot of medication for a long time. Nevertheless, she lived her life in good condition, remaining cheerful and free from pain.
What do you think my mom told herself every single day?
I am well, I feel good, I have everything I need, people like me and always liked to be with me; I am appreciated for my support, I thank God for being so well.
And then I looked at the statements and well-being of acquaintances and relatives of similar age. Some of them were taking medication and still had constant pain. Others took nothing and nevertheless felt constantly unwell and apathetic, both physically and mentally.
What do you think these people said to themselves every single day?
Happiness is just an illusion. It’s natural for a person to have pains after the age of 40. I never felt loved and accepted, never did or said truly what I wanted; I always served others.
If our core beliefs are positive and helpful, we need to take no further action. If they are not, we must seek to transform them because core beliefs that are limiting are the root causes of low self-esteem. They shape how we treat ourselves, others, and even how others may treat us. They set the rules by which we live and the tone of our self-talk.
What are the usual limiting beliefs
Limiting beliefs are across the board in our belief systems. From politics, to religion, to how we feel about a great tante that our parents didn’t like and talked about from an early age. Views we have about people and the world are nurtured from the time we were young.
1. Let’s look at limiting beliefs about finances:
- I can’t earn more money and still be a good person at the same time.
- We just weren’t born to be wealthy.
- Look, even those with money are not happier.
How do you feel about money? How do you view wealthy people? What did you hear in the family about money and well-being?
The questions mentioned above are often answered in conversations with responses that individuals have seen and heard from their ancestors within their own families. It is not easy to identify these for ourselves because often we don’t even know they exist.
2. Let’s look at limiting beliefs about relationships:
- I am not loveable.
- I am not good enough, they will leave me for another one.
- I will never get this from him, although I am pleasing him all the time.
How do you feel about the feminine and masculine energies? What is your ideal relationship and do you think it is possible to have one? How can I truly connect and keep my freedom at the same time?
These are limiting beliefs you may hold about relationships that may have come up and challenged you in your connection. For someone who was raised in an environment, where she saw men cheat on their wife, then can have a belief that men were unfaithful. She must control the man to make sure that she can keep him beside her. Or someone who witnessed in the family that the woman serves the man, they can have a belief that men are not even capable of taking care of themselves. In this case, the woman is no longer a woman in the relationship, but rather Mother Teresa or a caregiver.
3. Let’s look at limiting beliefs about yourself:
- I am not enough, not worthy.
- I can never be successful, others are better than me.
- Anyone I would love to be in a relationship with will leave me.
How do you see yourself? Are you always enough? Do you think you are beautiful? Do you think you are worthy?
Any lack of worthiness and we are forgetting WHO WE REALLY ARE! If any of these scenarios remind you of your situation, or one similar, observe your current thoughts from “outside” and bring yourself back to the present. Recognize your present personality, soul and capability, because you are no longer touchable by anything or anyone from the past.
If we have negative views of others, we may think of them as untrustworthy, as wishing to hurt us, or as demeaning, uncaring, or manipulative. All of these beliefs may make us very anxious to avoid rejection and overly keen to seek validation from others.
Turn your limiting beliefs to positive affirmations
Limiting beliefs are erased once you are watching the mind and realize that you are not your thoughts. You are your HEART and SOUL. You are perfect how you are, as there is no one else like you in this world. You are unique. Spend less energy in limiting beliefs because they DO NOT serve you. Focus more time on your true energy of limitlessness. Erase the limiting beliefs instantaneously through this practice.
What you actually need to do now is turn the negative into positive; you have the opportunity to transform every negative thought into positive affirmations in the present moment.
Dig the limiting beliefs up, confront them, and destroy them today.
Remembering who YOU ARE and who you have always been.
TIP
- Create your own list of limiting beliefs.
- Cross these out and create your own affirmation list to apply positive turnarounds. eg: I am enough.
- Whenever you feel some limiting beliefs creep in, read your list.
- Do the exercise until you own these new beliefs.
- Keep reminding yourself of who you are until you believe it.
Struggling to find happiness?
Unable to identify your limiting beliefs?
Despite what you’ve read, do you need a compass before you are able to navigate your life on your own?
You’re not alone with these thoughts.
In reality, we all sometimes need an external mirror in which we can see ourselves.
Working with me is not just supporting you finding and seeing these beliefs but also transforming them into positive affirmations and anchoring them. I have a capability to feel and see you as you are without these beliefs from the beginning. I am willing to hold that mirror to show you how wonderful you are without the “essential masks”.
With the Autogenic training you can uncover further limiting beliefs and in alpha and theta state the new patterns will be implemented to free you for the rest of your life.
SOUL is perfect and you are soul. You are PERFECT NOW!
DON’T YOU DESERVE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST?
Written by: Agnes Szabo
Transformational coach, life coach and autogenic training therapist
